Sunday, December 30, 2007

Why libertarianism has never really taken off

You'd think such a political philosophy would be the order of the day, people like Ron Paul should be elected President in a heartbeat, I mean what is more important and American and critical to a democracy and people's pursuit of happiness than unfettered liberty? then again we have

the drug situation,

and not just the ordinary drugs that used to make for movies like French Connection grown from poppy fields in Afghanistan but things made up by weird and evil scientists, mad eggheads who can't just go off in the woods and beat off around a log fire while drinking Coronas after a bad day of fishing like most normal American men...sci-fi writer Aldous Huxley sang their praises, the father of LSD and then there's also

unfettered abortion

late-term fetuses (proper usage now) in garbage bins & a kid's right (in libertarian views) to access porn in public libraries. Libertarianism will always be a minority and eccentric political movement, people want some protection from the Ravages of Life even if it means government has to step in every once in a while.


it's a shame, some people just don't want peace.

In z's view the largest obstable to a proper ecumenical understanding and accord between the world's religions is not things like

Mel Gibson

but radical Islam (wondering how a robust discussion of this is going over at Hannityland where they have special rules regarding conversations about Islam).

Friday, December 21, 2007

...while we're on the subject...

offenses for which you can go to hell

So you're using the handicapped stall in the men's room, you always like them better anyway, better accomodations, more room to spread out (if only Larry Craig, well never mind), DVD player, the works, so you're using the stall and there's an old disabled guy in a wheelchair with the runs waiting AND you have porn in there too...


how come cats never get insomnia? In fact they seem positively narcoleptic at times.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Make yourself at home

So I was at least 45 minutes delayed masturblogging today 'cos some computer user at the library leaves his station to go outside for a smoke, goes back to the computer, strike that, his computer, continues vegetating in front of YouTube all the while chatting on his cell, he has something in his ear with a wire, he thinks he's Jack Bauer...would you like a Corona and a bowl of party mix w/that?...another guy, the 30-something unemployed male live-at-home slug sitting next to him, also vegetating in front of YouTube...seems the days of staying at home circle-jerking to badly produced porn are a quaint relic from the Past, we seem to have evolved beyond this amoeba stage, now we take our act into the library -- SOLUTION: install software that cuts people off after a one-hour session let's say -- I'll buy you a computer, I'll take you to Circuit City myself in my 2005 Honda Civic, just get the hell off the computer already!!!

Saturday, December 08, 2007

The Republi-Cult and how it works

"overtime, overtime! yeah, oh God no!"

The Cult wants to bring You over to its worldview ("you have a problem with Sarko? you socialist slacker you!") and so you start feeling guilty ("you know I really should like work more"). Work is like a Zen experience for them instead of a means to an end to pay off a few bills, like Denny Crane and Alan Shore they sit on the balcony afterhours smoking their Don Tomases and go over the day. Only people on welfare, the poor folk, like, or rather, are obsessed with Sex, preferably with Judge Judy droning on in the background. Yeah yeah, we're hip, there's always time for a little tapping...

in between jobs,

but we know what's more important, the opening bell on Wall Street and we will bash any Pope who gets in our way by sermonizing over our excesses,

and NO, you got it all wrong, the French don't know how to enjoy Life better than we do, the pussies wouldn't even go to War, there are no alternative views and we will invalidate them anyway by our clever use of name-calling (Michelle Malkin is our Asian pit bull if you please, don't get on our bad side),

and we're so stupid (aka The Stupid Party) that we don't even know our language doesn't resonate with the People anymore, we've lost the common touch and we'll most assuredly lose the next Election to HillObama. Our own Republican pollster Frank Luntz likes to remind us from time to time about how stupid we really sound but he can always be replaced, the only issue is how do we beat the Bitch?

Friday, December 07, 2007

The modern conservative Republican philosophy in a nutshell

they'd rather work than have sex,

it's a kind of weird and cultish thing, sex is ok but we much prefer to stimulate the economy rather than ourselves. Sex is basically to breed workers for the future anyway.

I worked with a guy once who was told to take a vacation and he said "do I have to?" He was told yes and so he worked somewhere else during his week off. He told me he's a hardcore Democrat but I think he's really a closet Republican.

We have SARKO posters in our bedrooms.

Thursday, December 06, 2007

What exactly is Mall Security???

The latest chapter in the Psycho Rules (because we let it), some 19-year old loser who lost his job at McDonald's and his girlfriend too went to a major mall in Omaha, Nebraska yesterday with a gun and shot 8 holiday shoppers to death. Now z always found these tragic episodes problematic, here you have one psychotic a-hole who wanted to "go out in style" (he also shot himself of course, they always do) against hordes of innocent people, I know your first impulse is to flee and find cover, fear is a great paralyzer (I'm thinking out loud here as I always do) but the larger issue is how do you define Mall Security? They don't even carry guns or tasers, some of them are ex-cons and you don't even see them patrolling the mall all day, chances are they're in the Mall Security office glancing at about 4 or 5 TV monitors on the wall if they're not dozing off already. Ditto VA Tech. Z is just tired of reading about these predictable tragedies every few months (they seem to follow a cycle), do we just passively accept our victimhood?

(it can only help him)

From the 12/5 edition of the New York Post:

Dems trade 'choice' words

Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton's team had a pro-choice supporter bash rival Sen. Barack Obama's record on abortion rights - but his camp responded with past praise from his basher.

Ellen Malcolm, president of pro-choice EMILY's List, held a press conference denouncing Obama for voting "present" instead of "yes" on a "critical" abortion rights bill when he was in the Illinois Legislature.

She also faulted a US Senate floor speech he gave opposing Chief Justice John Roberts because Obama "barely" mentioned Roe vs. Wade.

But Obama's camp released a May 2006 letter from Malcolm praising his "fighting to make change happen."

Geoff Earle

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

George Will columns

they suck the energy right out of you, now I just turn the page. The guy could write a sex book that you don't want to read, I was feeling fine before I read his column now I'm just tired but it's not a good tired and I just want to lie down, give my head a rest. His vast mind wanders all over the place as when he wrote that people engage in all kinds of things, even war, basically because they're bored. He's hip though 'cos he writes a baseball column every now and then.

Come on dude, how do you feel about medical marijuana? enough with the antebellum musings.

Monday, December 03, 2007

but you're missing the point man

From the New York Post, 12/2:

Taking wacky out of weed

Scientists have reportedly found a way to take the "high" out of marijuana while keeping its medical benefits.

The find by University of London scientists could lead to the development of medicines to treat conditions such as epilepsy, obesity and chronic pain, according to a report on

The researchers said they found a way of allowing the chemical THC to relieve pain, while blocking the mood-altering effects.

Cathy Burke

Sunday, December 02, 2007

.....ooops, just a little more,

Saw a commercial for Efflexor last night, if your other antidepressants aren't really helping you there's this but potential side effects MAY include an increased risk for suicide especially in children and young adults (kids are depressed again because why?) and so help me out here, you're depressed and this pill MAY make you kill yourself, I'm not getting this one but look on the bright side, you won't be depessed any longer (but other people will because of what you did and then they'll take Efflexor)...reminds me a little of bequeathing,

Truthfully, only Rudy Hillary and Barack are the only real interesting candidates here. Watching the Sunday morning shows, now I know politics is a dry subject but these shows are so BORING, z-man just wants to go back to mast...masturblogging. I mean even before he was a serious candidate John McCain must have on these shows at least a thousand times, Tim Russert always looks like he has the trots and the men's room is ocupado.....prison boredom.

I'm not a big fan of talking and eating at the same time, for me it's an effort, you go visit people, it's a birthday party and everyone's chowing down talking a mile a minute about whatever, they're not bad people but can we have some rules here? Z-man, being the contemplative type, wants to stay home next time, watch the car chase in Bullitt one more time, really study it.

Thoughts on money

Had a debate once about you can't take it with you with an older person, said why not spend it while you can and have a good time and she made the point that bequeathing it is more important on down the line so I got to thinking let's put this into practice,

the children have been left their fortune by Mom and Dad, sharing the same guiding philosophy as they did they hardly spend it either so they grow old and make out their will and the succeeding generation does the same thing and so on for 5 generations but it just sits there, meanwhile Iran now has the nukes and Putin's successors have teamed up with China and they're threatening the West so yes, it IS important to have a nice nest egg,

"the money's there, don't worry but you can't touch it"
"why is it there?"
"I really don't know but it's important that it's there and it stays there"
"Can I take some out?"
"Of course but just a little bit at a time"
"Is that a mushroom cloud I see?"

Saturday, December 01, 2007

A common male attitude

You'll often hear a married man or just one who has a steady girlfriend say this among the boys:

"Going to a strip club and getting a lap dance or two is not really cheating."

In a strictly legal sense, ok, if you define cheating as having intercourse (my my, how Billy Boy has corrupted the country, you asked for a legacy pal, you got it, thanx brotherman!), but in z's book it's cheating in a spiritual sense and anyway

if you really dug her you wouldn't be going there.

Friday, November 30, 2007

Maybe Tim Russert can be his first guest

Watching the "Today" show this morning and big Al Roker seemed a little out of sorts, nervous maybe and why does everyone wear black on this show? going to alot of funerals lately?

could be the I-Man's return to the WABC airwaves come Monday morning.

Tom Oliphant has nothing to worry about though, went on the PBS Newshour with Jim Lehrer shortly after Imus' firing and gave a reasoned defense of the man, only former regular guest of Imus who did as I recall,

the rest of you? I don't know, it's a bad karma kind of deal.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Obama vs. Hillary

It's nice to see the gloves come off and Obama stop being such a candy-ass but

why throw rocks at a junkyard dog?

Monday, November 26, 2007

My video store just closed, the one with the granny porn

Gotta have the granny porn these days even if only 5 people in your homestate are into it, it's one of the central tenets of political correctness to cater to all tastes. Place was run by an older respectable-looking Korean family man type, the kind with the chopsticks and the paper you don't know how the hell they read (I hear they read it opposite than us, from right to left, go figure), I liked the guy and you got a free movie after renting 10 videos, mainstream movies I'm talking about here. When it comes to midget porn your local video store owner is probably like a drug dealer, doesn't use the stuff himself but hey, it pays the bills. He didn't exactly put a gun to your head you perv you and make you watch that free sampler you still have stuck in your head, the one with the barely legal and still pimply 18-year old girl who headed out to LA 'cos she answered some high-class modeling ad and thought she'd be the next Angelina Jolie, only now she's doing a Slurpee on screen with a straw looking completely disgusted. All my favorite shopping haunts have or will eventually go out of business, it's the pattern, Coconuts becomes FYE and FYE becomes Sprint, if not a cell-phone store (like we need another one) they become a mini automall. Don't you just want to go up to that 20 year old guy yakking it up on his cell in the mall and take it and just chuck it into the fountain with the golden pony and let it sink to the bottom with all the nickels and dimes and quarters while his friend on the other end hears a nice gurgling sound? Anyway, gotta find a new video outlet, workers gotta be let go after every 6 or 7 years or so, they can fend for themselves, Roger over there needs a new cell to stick in his ear and some other guy needs a Hummer for the next invasion planned by Putin,

New World Order stuff.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

I really don't want to hear this song anymore

'Tis the Christmas season, the weekend after Thanksgiving (El Dia de Pavo) which means all the music stations have started their Christmas playlists which means hearing Adam Sandler's 20 versions of his Hannukah song after every commercial break, used to be funny and I enjoyed it every year in the past ("O.J. Simpson, not a Jew") but please don't play it anymore. If WPLJ traffic man Joe Nolan can get Madonna's butchery of that classic "American Pie" off the airwaves for good z can do his little part. I'm in a serious mood this season what with the water and all and Kevin Trudeau's twilight zone of a book (do I take a bath in Poland Spring? that's gonna run me into some money) and it just gets on my nerves, like some twit making fart noises with his hands ("but guess who is (a Jew that is), all 3 Stooges" - ARGHHH!!!) when I'm trying to ponder Life. Let it go, let it rest, if you really want it get the CD.

Why didn't anyone tell me I was going mental?

Reading Kevin Trudeau's once bestseller Natural Cures "They" Don't Want You to Know About (Alliance Publishing Group - 2004) and he has a whole section on the water thing, you see the guv'ment has decided to put small amounts of chlorine and fluoride into the water supply and I'm thinking, ok, maybe the guy has a point until he makes this point, to wit every time you step in the shower, what with the steam and all it is a veritable gas chamber. Now when you start to go mental isn't there a point in time where you even remotely suspect this? like when they're all making a bad movie doesn't the director hold a meeting or something and let the cat out of the bag - "you know this project really sucks, maybe they're right about us and we're all on drugs."

Worked in la biblioteca once where any female worker was encouraged to call the coppers if they didn't like how a male patron was looking at them so how do you define staring? Now a 20 minute Nosferatu-like stare, ok, maybe, perhaps but these chicks seem to have the need to have a problem, they never met a bona-fide stalker in their life but they have a poetic, diva-like requirement for one, meanwhile some other guy, you don't know exactly why, brings out their inner slut.

Another point against porn (if you haven't guessed by now I'm against it not just on a moral level but on the aesthetics of it all), porn sets up false expectations, the UPS guy expects some accion with the lonely housewife. Now my nausea gets set off rather easily, it could be as simple as that third cup of coffee in the morning, so how could anyone in real life engage in these monstrous bj's? It's the normal guys you have to watch out for, the nice guys with the dough, the hedge-fund managers who are getting ideas and suggestions from the ever-expanding porn menu, meanwhile the guy in the library can't help staring, you just look nice.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

An insomniac's logic

I work with a woman who says she's a bit of a chronic insomniac, on a good night she'll get 2 hours shuteye tops but says she tosses and turns anyway so I gave her some helpful suggestions,

do you read? reading for an hour tires your eyes out
"so I'm sipping my chamomile watching the boys 'n' the girls and their sex appeal"
do you watch Charlie Rose?

so I finally said to her why not a little Unisom action? to which she said she doesn't like taking sleep aids 'cos they make you tired the next day,

you mean more tired than you've been lately? You're a [bleepin'] insomniac for cryin' out loud, you're already tired

logic logic logic, in short supply these days like all those advocates of hardcore drugs who are hellbent on preaching the evils of alcohol, like seeing pink elephants gliding over the horizon is more healthy than the Goose.

Operation Clinton - your ass is grass

mowing down the opposition

According to our venerable and esteemed journalist Bob Novak, who still remembers exactly what he was doing the day Abe Lincoln was shot, Camp Hillary has some very damaging information on Barack Obama and has been spreading the word,

geez, I wonder what he did?

Operation Clinton, lest you think we lost our touch

(I was worried there for a minute)

Monday, November 19, 2007

Like I'm not sure what's supposed to happen here

Worked in a deli once and the guy just went on his lunch, a nice young man with an eye for the ladies, and it's kinda slow, early evening and this attractive young lady approaches the counter, looked like Teri Hatcher, and so I very casually saunter over ready to take her order when a blur of color whuuushes past me, the guy's back from lunch and he does her order instead of me and I'm like


and so, in his head the pretty young woman married to a corporate lawyer, they're both just back from Rio and she's getting the cold cuts, is ready to risk it all and have an affair with a 20-something deli clerk because he was exceedingly nice to her and got her a 1/2 pound of Boar's Head Ovengold Roasted Turkey Breast sliced razor-thin of course, he had to get his micrometer out and a 1/4 lb. of yellow American,

I had more to offer though, much more. I know how to make quiche but he scared her off.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

I don't know how to break this to my folks

Sociologist or cultural professor or whatever she is, Christine B. Whelan, writing in yesterday's New York Post, says studies show that the college-educated fare much better in the romance and marriage stakes department, they are less likely to divorce than those without college degrees and far less likely to have kids out of wedlock than us uneducated yokels (presumably those with degrees never use drugs or watch porn either). The degreed also attract more members of the opposite sex, the Educated Man is more likely to be seen as a good provider (Dr. Laura's apologia for Social Darwinism).

I'm concerned. You see my Mom and Dad have been married for over 50 years now. Dad was a Navy WW2 vet and then drove a truck for almost 50 years, Mom never had a degree, both are now happily retired (or are they?) with full pensions and Social Security. How do I tell them they're on the road to ruin?

Friday, November 16, 2007

The bee-itch

You may have heard, a woman on one of John McCain's campaign stops asked him "so how do we beat this bitch?" to which he replied "that's an excellent question." Usual denunciations, now if you make the case the sitatution was highly inappropriate, well ok, I won't argue with you there, just seems to me in a more humorous, less pc age it would all have been so hilariously funny. McCain's from the olde school, for cryin' out loud the guy was a POW for 5 years, can't have a little fun?

Ever walk out of the store at the mall and forget where the hell you parked? So you're walking with your bag and you don't want to look like an idiot, all the silver Honda Civics begin to look alike - "Mommy, who's that man who can't find his car? Is he on drugs?" - and you begin to think your car was stolen until you finally find it and vow it will never happen again but it does.....

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

People who leave Mass at Communion time,

it's like they see the Mass as a movie and the credits are rolling.

Friday, November 02, 2007

A poem.....

Be patient suffering soul, I hear thy cry
The trial fires may glow but I am nigh.
I see the silver and I will refine
Until My image shall upon it shine.
Fear not, for I am near, thy help to be
Greater than all thy pain My love for thee.

Friday, October 12, 2007

Speed bumps the size of mountains

I mean I understand there's people who drive a little too fast...

A sure sign of age

I used to make fun of all the old people who go to the library and hog up the computers looking up their ailments but now I'm starting to look up my ailments too...

so here I am every day putting ear drops in my ear because people talk too damn low and they're the real problem. It's like when Judge Judy tells people to speak the hell up,

God I love that woman, kudos and God bless Judy, these low-talkers are a plague on the Earth.

Tuesday, October 09, 2007

The New York Post

A friend of mine says he hates this paper but he's hooked on it. There's the high politics and commentary section to give it a somewhat respectable gloss and then there's the


like some 18-year old pasty-faced porn geek is writing and editing certain sections and masturbating while he does it like yesterday's millionth sex survey about how New York City's women rank at the top in terms of kink.

I cannot endorse this paper anymore and I know Phil Mushnick feels the same way but he can't say anything. It's like watching Ron Jeremy, you have to take a shower afterwards.

Friday, October 05, 2007

The Camille Paglia theory of Britney's meltdown

Dr. Phil says it may be a wise thing to have her involuntarily committed, she may even pose a suicide risk the theory being that Owen Wilson, look how normal and happy-go-lucky he was and what he did so what would a kooky person do? I'd love to have Britney's life though, I mean the good aspects, you're being creative and artistic and don't have to put in your 9-5 like most of us paeons. Even if she never put out another CD and called it quits on her touring she has enough of the dinars to live happily ever after so

wha'sa problem?

I gotta go along with feminist writer Camille Paglia though. In any good investigation you can create a timeline and a linear clue quickly emerges, her life began to, ever so slightly, spiral out of control the day she and Madonna liplocked at the Video Music Awards on MTV, Paglia calls it her kiss of death. So maybe it's not so much what Dr. Phil says or the Brooke Shields theory of post-partum depression (is this responsible for the situation in the Middle East too Brooke?) but it may have everything to do with her moral compass. You look at that other problem child Lindsay and you feel her hopes are better, she at least seems very aware she has a problem and is actually more likeable than Brit who recently served her own Mom with a court order to stay away from her own grandkids while she's on her meds and don't blame it all on the paparazzi either, these people want fame but they don't want it but they still want their picture in the paper.

I personally don't believe Britney deserves all this coverage, a one-year blackout on all things Britney might be a good thing. Last I checked we had a War on Terror going on.....

Thursday, October 04, 2007

The main thread of history: liberty vs. worship of the State

Free Burma! bloggers unite for a cause we can all agree on.

Saturday, September 29, 2007

The new breast cancer/alcohol link

The neo-Puritan movement will come up with anything these days.

Drink up gals!

Rudy courting the NRA

now it's getting downright creepy

very Nosferatu-like, like the undead Danny Glick boy in "Salem's Lot" floating up to the bedroom window of his friend and tapping on the glass

"right-wing base let me in
right-wing base let me in"

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Ahmadinejad - I want you to want me

The leader of Iran, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, at Columbia University yesterday, introduced as a "cruel and petty dictator" by President Lee Bollinger of whom you may have heard. Lee came on strong right out of the gate so as not to have that screaming mimi, Michelle Malkin, write a column about him and about the precincts of the radical Left in academia that he inhabits. Forget about Ahmadinejad's Holocaust denial, his nuclear ambitions, his call for Israel to be wiped off the map. Re gays he said this: "There are no homosexuals in Iran like in this country."

This is not good.

(In fact, this is serious stuff)

Holocaust denial. I had a neighbor once, an older gentleman and he gave my Mom some literature. I always thought he was a regular right-wing kind of guy, pro-life, opposed sex education, but there it was, "documentation" that the Jews invented the Holocaust to keep the $$$$$ rolling in. Now a respectable conspiracy theory I'm all for, mainstream ones like JFK's assassination and I'm all ears, but in order for the Holocaust to never have happened you'd have to have all the major historians in on it for starters. Wouldn't one of them say "I ain't gonna be a part of this"? The mind boggles,


Fidel Castro is now the most respectable tyrant on the world stage, remarkable for his wondrous health-care system, no cruel and petty dictator he or, as Michael Moore believes

you scratch my nuts and I'll scratch yours.

Sunday, September 23, 2007

What Confucius didn't tell you

Even if your life is not all that you'd like it to be, it's a failure in artistic terms, everybody is at least able to do one thing well and this gives some purpose to your life. For some people it's gardening, for others it's mechanical ability, some have an artistic bent and paint. No matter how my life is going I like to be known as the guy you go to if you want to make quiche. Confucius said "if you enjoy what you do you'll never work another day in your life." I was on a recent visit to the famed Culinary Institute of America (CIA for short) in New Hyde Park, New York just past Poughkeepsie and there was an energy in the air, young students in various classes learning the finer aspects of the gustatory arts. There is even a portrait of Paris Hilton's grandfather in the lobby, granddad must be proud up there. What Confucius didn't tell anyone is that in a few years time these aspiring chefs will be working some very long shifts, 12-14 hours a day for 6 days a week on average in some very hot kitchens where civility is not the norm. The flip side to Confucius' maxim is that you can quickly hate what you used to love to do.

There is a line near the end of the movie Wild at Heart where the fairy godmother in a vision of some sort tells the Nicolas Cage character, Sailor, "if you're truly wild at heart you'll fight for your dreams. Don't turn away from love." These are really some profound words, it's my whole philosophy of Life and even if you fail at your dreams you put up the good fight and it ain't over 'til your friends finally send you off with that cold-cut platter fringed with the olive loaf and the mortadella (no wonder this country is so fat, we're fixated on eating even while we're in mourning). Fight for your dreams even if others don't agree or put roadblocks on the path to your Happiness. Boredom is the bane of existence or, as the final line in the mystical poem "Manhunt in the Desert" says "take life by the root."

Saturday, September 22, 2007

Let's touch on lab animals

Not much of a debate anymore but in its heyday animal experimentation to cure diseases was a hot topic. During such lulls we can look at these controversies with more of a level head and so I've been wondering, millions and millions of assorted creatures, from rodents to monkeys, have given their lives so let's posit that the researchers are morally correct, the larger goal is saving human lives and so some egghead psycho causes a tumor in a white rat, hey that's cool but

where are all the cures? (I'm not a vegan btw)

Next time you use some big word at work, well not really that big a word but big to them, and they say how smart you are ask them why they're so dumb. Next time someone says you're over their head say WHY? It's chic to be dumb, call them on it.

Why is it assumed, in a male-dominated work environment and you're a man, if you don't talk about your sex life you're not getting any? It's like do you want me to keep a diary? Poor Man's Kennedy's son wants to know.

Americans have a weird way of mourning, no matter how tragic the death, say your best friend gets hit by a Budweiser truck, everyone's obsessed with food, even before the death invites go out it's catering at your local deli. What? can't mourn on an empty stomach?

Friday, September 21, 2007

Hillary the Panderer

So much for Dick Morris' political strategy of triangulation which Bill Clinton followed with some success. Hillary at this point is not even pretending to appeal to the vast swath of conservative voters out there, it's full-throttle Left, to take a line from Dennis Miller as applied to Rush Limbaugh Hill is like a shopping carriage with a bad wheel that just constantly pulls leftward. Take the Jena 6.

In Jena, Louisiana 6 black high school students have been arrested and were to be prosecuted for attempted murder following the vicious beating of a white teenager, the charges have now been downgraded to battery. Seems a black student sat under a tree that was reserved for some white trash and three nooses appeared in the tree soon after. The white student was hospitalized and is now on the mend and an appeals court dismissed the conviction of one black student who was tried as an adult.

Now I don't for the life of me, maybe I'm dreaming, but I don't get how the Revs. Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson are referring to this sorry episode in race relations in this country as the next Selma but there she was, Madame herself, on Sharpton's radio show:

"I know you and I don't condone violence of any kind but this situation raises very serious questions of injustice and inequality (what injustice? if 6 whites had attacked a black they'd get at least 20 years and rightly so - z). And it shines a bright spotlight on the disparate treatment (emphasis z's) that happens all too often in our country still today in affecting African-American young people in the criminal justice system" (you mean thugs Hill whom respectable blacks don't even want to associate with? - editor).

The only relevant question here is this - did all these African-American young people who are allegedly receiving disparate treatment at the hands of our legal system guilty of the crimes they've gone to prison for? Hillary seems to be saying no otherwise her statement makes no logical sense so this would be a massive national scandal indeed, our country throwing innocent blacks in jail by the millions day after day BUT a little bird sat on z's shoulder the other day and told him that Hill is just

pandering (this happens when you take Timbaland's money)

Thursday, September 20, 2007

If counting to 10 worked we wouldn't have Prozac

As everyone now knows Sally Field, during the Emmy broadcast, said this: "If mothers ruled the world there would be no {gd} wars in the first place." In her syndicated column of yesterday ("Sally the Sheep - This mom doesn't buy Fields' folly") the Asian pit bull of the Right, Michelle Malkin, writes that Field is your stereotypical Hollywood liberal and permissive parent:

"She's the mom who buys her teenager beer, condoms and a hotel room on prom night because she'd rather give in than assert her parental authority and do battle."

Now we don't know if the Flying Nun would hold underage drinking parties in her own home, I'm betting that she wouldn't, but this is slanderous and Malkin may very well have to eat some humble pie real soon.

Later on Malkin quotes a mother whose Marine son has already served three tours of duty in Iraq, a Ms. Deborah Johns. Re anti-war activist Cindy Sheehan Johns says: "She has never spoken for me. And she will never speak for me...We are not going to let the domestic enemies at home defeat us like they did during the Vietnam War" (another strain of the "We Almost Won in Vietnam if We Just Stuck it Out Longer" brigade). You see this is the overarching theme of the conservative movement, social and political stability which it turn leads to never questioning your own government, conservatives have made a religion out of conformity. "Domestic enemies", aka those '60s radical protestors of Vietnam, very McCarthyite indeed.

Like with cops so immersed in their own world (remember the FBI profiling of the late Richard Jewell) some, nay most, conservative talking heads are so immersed in their own world that they develop a kind of political tunnel vision (ditto for liberals btw). You have to understand that with Malkin if you in any way oppose the war you are in effect on the side of Evil and this is her starting point in all of her writing. Now I never thought awards shows like the Emmys should be given over to politics of whatever stripe but the way I look at it is this is still America and not Amerika and Gidget does have a perfect right to her opinion and to express it and to sue Malkin for libel and personal defamation if she so chooses.

A good rule to go by though is what I call the Bob Newhart Rule. Bob says that while he has strong views on things himself he always felt it was his thing to entertain and not educate. I didn't watch the Emmys 'cause I don't watch most TV these days, I have to rely on Tasmanian Devils like Malkin to fill me in.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Barry Manilow's elvin rage

He won't appear anymore on "The View" as long as conservative co-host Elisabeth Hasselback is on, says she is "dangerous and offensive." I honestly never knew Barry was such a big lib probably 'cause I never much listened to his music, I put it in the John Denver and Anne Murray category. So what does she have to do with the price of onions? I say get Engelbert Humperdinck.

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

For the love of work

Some people love the work experience, me? I love the leisure experience and here's where I differ most markedly with most conservatives these days, I haven't made a fetish out of work yet. I do believe in the hammock. Some people just love the adrenaline rush. I worked with a chef once in a supermarket and he went back to the restaurant scene, probably got bored with the somewhat more leisurely pace of a food retail outlet. For them they have to keep producing something, work for them is like what the Big O is for others, me? I like cogitating and meditating and mast, masturblogging. The workaholics, when they die are your poltergeists, restless spirits who can't stay six feet under. The chef ones have to knock the peppermill off the shelf when you're cooking, see, you should be using that. People who have lockers at work, isn't that getting a little too into it? which leads me into my latest dream sequence:

I'm on an old familiar bus route and I'm rapping with the oldsters on board but in the back of my mind is I drive a car so why am I taking the bus? There's some anxiety in the dream 'cause I have to transfer to another bus to get home and then I have to walk up a hill. My interpretation, I will most likely retire with just SS to live on since I get tired of working for the same company after a few years. I get frustrated with the overworkload, the corporate culture, the sameness of it all, the whatever so in my dream that's why I'm riding the bus, no pension to pay things like car insurance.

That new fall series about the Geico Cavemen, who said this would be a good idea? critics have seen early releases and panned the thing. They worked better in commercials. I say instead of a failed TV series do more ads and then compile them all on DVD.

Many times when a person says so-and-so is doing well they're not doing well at all. This happens often when someone leaves a job abruptly or moves out of the neighborhood and everyone starts inquiring how he or she is doing. A co-worker who is friends with the person who left will say "oh, I hear she's doing really great" even though she got tired of her family life and quit her job with no Plan B and left for another state and is living in an apartment with her girlfriend supporting her. Oh, she's doing great? What as, a prostitute? Like the guy I know who works two full-time jobs and boasts he always has time for a little "tapping." Gay.

Thursday, September 06, 2007

A seminar I'd like to attend

When I can I go to my main library in the big YO, it's usually on my day off. Sometimes I go twice a day, I will go after work on occasion. You notice things, libraries are magnets for certain kinds of people, a subgroup being the ones who don't work. On my day off I'll go there when the place opens at 9, there's always a healthy looking, 40-something man there waiting for the doors to open. He drives, not a jalopy either, so somehow he finds a way to pay his car insurance. He doesn't look like he's missing for a meal either and he jumps on the computer as soon as the doors swing open and he'll be there later too. In between he reads the paper. Now my day off varies but he's always there so you can safely draw the conclusion that he's not brown-bagging it pulling off a 9-5. Maybe he's making wanksta movies (uncle booty productions, who knows?) but then there's another man, slightly younger but also of a hale and hearty complexion who parks himself in one of those cozy butt-numbing soft chairs they have for reading and he tackles a novel every day, Robert Ludlum, you name it, just like the snake plant on the circulation desk he's always there.

I myself haven't figured out a way yet to make ends meet without working and believe me I've been trying. I'd be real interested to know if any of these gentlemen are holding any type of seminars soon, I'd like to sign up.

Liberal commentary on the Cho matter

The latest is Marc Fisher's piece in yesterday's New York Post, for the sheer inner workings of the liberal mind it can't be beat. Virginia Governor Tim Kaine's review panel charged with investigating the Virginia-Tech shootings came out, apparently heads are not gonna roll over this one. Is everyone mental? I mean there's a real crisis going on and they're talking about the, get this, the e-mails should have gone out faster. I'm sorry but if there's a psycho on campus getting ready to rock you get on the intercom, the loudspeaker, the bullhorn and get the people the hell out and lock the place down. Maybe we're too obsessed with the computer these days, it's like it's our only frame of reference even in an emergency ("Grandad's having a heart attack, e-mail your brother.")

But what I'm really getting at is the liberalism behind all the punditry. Now the reader may recall all the apocalyptic moral denunciations of Don Imus, you may have heard, but Cho was a sorry character who slipped through the cracks who didn't get the help he needed (kinda our fault as usual). At least he never chopped on black basketball players like Jimmy the Greek did once, a topic sportswriter Phil Mushnick is still obsessed with. And what's the deal with this quiet loner line already? Over 90% of whatever you want to call them probably wouldn't even shoot a deer, can we get over the defense of social cliques already? Few years ago criticism of cliques was all the rage, now it's a crime to not be in one.

Bottom line is Don Imus is still more evil than the Virginia-Tech killer, no talk of chemical-imbalance there. At worst Cho had issues, liberalism holds, as Mr. Fisher demonstrates, that he was mental but not evil. We reserve that phrase for the politically incorrect (Whoopie, watch your back).

Thursday, August 23, 2007

I'm going to chuck it all and become homeless

To hear conservatives tell it the homeless have the life. There's a homeless man in the big YO, a late 30-something blond guy with raggedy clothes who walks along that endless shopping plaza known as Central Ave. and who drinks coffee from cups that people throw away outside of Barnes and Noble. So one day we're driving along and my Republican friend, God bless him, says to me "look at that guy, he doesn't have a care in the world." Now I will admit sleeping under the stars on a 10 degree night does have a certain romantic appeal to it but I think this is why the Republican, whoever he is, will lose the next election to HillObama, that and lack of health insurance for millions of Americans. Now I understand the government paying your medical bills amounts to a form of European-style socialism but what is Republicans' alternative? It's like they don't even talk about it, it's not on their radar screen


so who better has their finger on the PULSE?

Saturday, August 18, 2007

50 cents away from a cure

You've basically been a good person your whole life but you were in the A&P once and there by the courtesy desk is the Muscular Dystrophy coinholder, you know the ones that hold several quarters in cutout circles so nobody's around and you lean over pretending to be looking at the sales flier and you pluck two George Washingtons for the coffee vending machine. Nobody gets hurt, it's a victimless crime and besides the government and private charities have been throwing millions at the dread disease for years, all those quarters are only for show to make the shallow feel good about themselves like they're really doing something. Decades later you pass on and are naked before the Lord as my mother would say. You are about to be accepted, the Gates are ready to swing open but the angel going over your life stops at something on the computer. He says to you mankind almost cured the dread MD but they were just 50 cents away from a cure.

are you in some deep doodoo!

Friday, August 17, 2007

Memo to John Stossel, they're still pervs

"20/20" is slated tonight to have a special expose of Chris Hansen and his NBC Dateline series "To Catch a Predator." Now early on in my blogging I did raise questions about the aggressive nature of this show, what if somebody is later found innocent? what about entrapment? but by and large those e-mails are pretty straightforward and, to paraphrase Sigmund Freud sometimes a perv is just a perv.

Libertarian Stossel needs to go easy, every once in a while, every blue moon or so people do care what other people do in their bedrooms.

Monday, August 13, 2007

My solution to the illegal immigration problem

If you're not willing to round up the, what's the latest figure?, 12 million or so illegals then regularize them, if you don't want to regularize them then deport 'em.

So you're a good ole American conservative and opposed the recent push to pass through immigration reform in the Congress, what exactly does this mean? Explain.

Don't deport then regularize, don't regularize then deport. Me? I think my position is pretty much on the record.

Monday, August 06, 2007

Phil Mushnick - grouch

Veteran sportswriter for the New York Post (why is this tabloid entering my blogging ways more and more these days?) Phil Mushnick is now a social critic-at-large too, he is now mostly a roving moralist. I remember him from years ago when New York City reporter for Channel 5 News (now Fox News) Penny Crone had a brief stint at WABC Radio and Mushnick called up to say she was unprofessional as a journalist to be rooting for the Yankees all the time (I know objectivity should apply to politics but sports?). Ever since then I knew he was a bit of a crank so it didn't surprise when he took the time to bash "Wheel of Fortune", arguably the most wholesome fare on TV, because, in his view they don't show enough close-ups of the puzzle to be solved. He's been ranting about Imus for years over his politically incorrect humor aimed at Jews, gays, blacks, old people, you name it. You see for Phil humor is never about nuance, it is what it is, forget the layering and don't bother him with your Cliff's Notes about your own jokes. Even though Mushnick is Jewish he is probably tempted at times to call the I-man the Antichrist. He's a decent enough fellow with good values but very strong on the censorship thing. It ain't his style to change the channel and neither should you. I can't judge the man except to say if you're having a party save yourself some grief and tear up his invite.

Saturday, August 04, 2007

You need a pill for the pill for the pill

TV commercial for Requip, used to treat the mysterious Restless Legs Syndrome, side effects may include nausea, drowsiness, dizziness, vomiting - you'll need another pill for all the side effects and if that pill causes additional side effects then you'll need a pill for that and if that pill.....I think I'll stick with the original ailment thank you.

Cialis, possible side effect: priapism - an erection lasting for more than 4 hours. Hey, read a good book buddy!

None of your %^#@* business

As reported in Page Six for Aug. 3: Time Out New York writer Alison Rosen asked former New York City Mayor Ed Koch "are you gay?" Koch: "When was the last time you performed oral sex on your boyfriend?" Rosen: "Well, I'm single now so it was a long time ago." (z - what's her # again?) Koch: "See, I don't think you should answer that question. (but she just did Ed) It's an improper question and so is yours. My sexual orientation is none of your business, and whether or not you performed oral sex on your boyfriend is none of my business." (I'll take that as a yes then)

Maybe it's all a moot point. Is there anyone out there, woman or man, gay or straight, who wants to have sex with the former mayor at this stage of the game?

Friday, August 03, 2007

Olde folk

(slated for late November, the Democratic AARP Bloggers Convention/Forum)

Now the folks I'm talking about here are not the Woodstock generation in their twilight years, you have to go back aways to know what I mean but I lived with an aunt once and I came home and bragged to her that I just spent only 3 bucks on a Mickie D's breakfast and she chided me for wasting money, said we have eggs here. These people, if funds are low they'll never go to an ATM, you see there are certain fees accruing ($2 maybe). So by eating sardines and crackers that night those 2 bucks they saved WILL make or break them. Then cars, the older some people get the less they like to drive, there's always the implication (or is it just my imagination?) that you really like to pack the miles on and maybe you do at times but that's only because you're claustrophobic and want to get out and see LIFE. Many folks, especially if they grew up in hard times, see everything in terms of a little Grapes of Wrath action. For me life's too short and you can't take it with you or, as someone once told me

I'd rather add life to my years than years to my life (actually he was a young cigar store clerk who probably couldn't wait to use this line to show how witty and Oscar Wildish he is and my friend and I were his next victims).

Conservatives who are really closet libs

Ann Coulter is a liberal plant to make conservatives look bad, that's old news but how 'bout radio commentator Michael Savage? Apatriot over at Hannityland has called him a "closet liberal" for years and at the time I dismissed this out of hand but last night he wouldn't talk about

The Bridge,

and so chose instead to bash the homeless (hmmm...). You see the homeless have deliberately and with aforethought chosen their lot in life of eating out of garbage cans because they are lazy and don't like to work. Now the phrase "doesn't like to work" has got to be the biggest cultural brainwashing done by the Right to date, hey, if you don't like WORK there must be something wrong with you, right? Not to toot my own horn (but go ahead) I've worked hard my whole life and have gotten rave reviews from employers but if you asked me a simple and direct question, "do you like work?", philosophically I'm very much against it, it's like what man wouldn't rather have a fishing rod or golf club in his hand? Homeless people, yep, they have the life.

But the real tipoff that Savage (nee Weiner) is a closet lib is when he said the radical Islamists are that way because they're sexually repressed (hell this country isn't and look at our problems) and he said the solution would be to airlift massive amounts of porn over the Middle East and drop it down (and oh yes, he supported uber-liberal California gubernatorial candidate Jerry Brown once). Now I don't know if there's such a species as a pro-porn conservative so I have to check my encyclopedia but last time I looked Dennis Prager fancied himself one too.

So enjoy the new series and send in your candidates.

Thursday, August 02, 2007

Our inept Department of Homeland Security

They've just ended the search for any real survivors in that tragic bridge collapse in Minneapolis when our own Dept. of Homeland Security sent word out that it doesn't appear to be an act of terror. Excuse me but isn't it way too early to be making these assessments either one way or the other? Why not just say it's being investigated and here's another thought, how do we know there aren't terrorists amongst us who are construction workers and bridge repairers and working with steampipes underground of major metropolises who are deliberately weakening our infrastructure or others who are tainting our food supply? Even if this were the case political correctness would be our own undoing and we'd never get to the bottom of anything, don't like working with that Muslim Con-Ed guy? you racist pig you.

The tragic I-85W bridge in Minnesota, not saying it is but what's up with our Dept. of Homeland Security making such impromptu announcements? Why does Bush even keep this Chertoff guy on, this guy who shortchanged New York City of much-needed anti-terror funds even though everyone knows Gotham is at the top of Al-qaeda targets? It's a little sketchy to me.

Thursday, July 26, 2007

The continuing controversy about the Third Secret

You'd never know it from watching the American media but there's a huge controversy roiling the Vatican right now and it pits a respected and mainstream Catholic Italian journalist, Mr. Antonio Socci, against the powerful Vatican Secretary of State, Cardinal Tarcisio Bertone and it involves the famed Third Secret of Fatima. In his book The Fourth Secret of Fatima (Rizzoli - 2006), meaning the second part of the Third which has never been disclosed, Socci makes an irrefutable case that the Vatican revealed only the vision of the prophecy on June 26, 2000 and that more is to come. In response Bertone published a book of his own, The Last Seer of Fatima (2007), refuting Socci and even calling him a liar. Bertone appeared on the nationwide Italian TV Channel RAI on a program called "Porta a Porta" to debunk the book but instead dug a deeper hole for himself. One compelling point Socci brings up in his book concerns Archbishop Loris Francesco Capovilla who was the personal Secretary of Pope John XXIII and has confirmed to another Italian journalist, Mr. Solideo Paolini, that there exist two texts to the Third Message.

It all goes back to the controversial Secret of La Salette, the last part that begins "In the Last Days Rome itself will lose the Faith and become the seat of the Antichrist." If you compare the famous diplomatic version of the Third Secret published in the Oct. 23, 1963 edition of the German paper Neues Europa (or "News of Europe") to this final part of La Salette, through the similar phraseology and apocalyptic themes you have the actual text of your Third Secret. Fatima is merely a reiteration of La Salette and this is at the real hidden root of the mishegas embroiling Rome right now. Antichrist would probably be a political leader or maybe just a demonic entity in general but successive popes feared misinterpretation and so kept leaving the matter to their successors.

"In the Third Secret we read, among other things, that the great apostasy in the Church begins at the top." -- Cardinal Mario Luigi Ciappi, who was papal theologian to five popes spanning 40 years

Things are just getting heated up folks so grab a chair and switch to Italian media unless you want to hear the latest on Britney Spears, I'm getting a little tired of it though.

Lindsay Lohan

It really is a shame, imho she's more useful than Britney and Paris combined. That rather cumbersome alcohol-monitoring device she has to wear strapped to her leg at all times is the perfect emblem of our puritanical age and it's not like she can fall back on soda, as the Today show's chief medical correspondent Dr. Nancy Snyderman informed us yesterday soda is a big no-no according to a study in the venerable New England Journal of Medicine and this morning she told us our friends can be bad for us too, they can enable your obesity, better to be a vegan loner I guess which is why you don't hear any bad stuff about Moby. At age 21 Lindsay cannot have a drink for the rest of her life, that's pretty gangster. A less puritanical person would say get to the root of your problem and by all means separate the drinking from the driving but give the gal a drink once in a while, she's thirsty like the rest of us. Here's hoping the pop tart falls back on her feet.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Big write-up in yesterday's Post about Elisabeth Hasselbeck

Written by New York Post writer Maureen Callahan it took up the better of two pages. The article, "The Survivor", points out that she has lasted longer than most of her View co-hosts, Meredith Vieira, the original Star Jones and Rosie of course. Liberalism has become so accepted these days at least in certain quarters that getting abortions and committing adultery is now considered normative, small wonder that conservative Hasselbeck comes across as an oddball for saying such erstwhile traditional things as adulterers make bad parents. Sarah D. Bunting, co-editor in chief of the website Television without Pity, has a very popular forum on "The View" in which people sound off on, it seems, mostly Elisabeth Hasselbeck. Bunting: "If I were one of the women on this show I would just be tired of her at this point. Joy Behar, I think, is even done trying with her." Funny but I find Behar's political views, or the expression of them, to be downright obnoxious with her own rigid and overly broad characterizations of conservatives (and btw most female comics are not the least bit funny). Geez, you'd think this was some supermarket job and Elisabeth was some seafood manager not pulling her weight so seriously do some people take this show. Why its continuance is basic to the survival of the Republic escapes me. Of course two of her former "Survivor" co-stars have nothing but bad things to say about her (where are they now?) and even the Donald chimes in with she is "one of the dumber people on TV and an imbecile" (pot-kettle-black). Last season "Law and Order" even had an episode where a victim of rape and murder was named Elisabeth Hassenbeck.

It's only a show, it's like she's getting the Dan Quayle treatment or something. As the libs like to say don't like it change the friggin' channel.

Chelsea Clinton for President in 2016

Keep the Dynasty of Socialism going.

Hillary clearly has Barack beat on foreign policy issues. The latest, re Monday night's YouTube/CNN debate, or is that the CNN/YouTube debate?, Hillary said he would be naive to meet with the leaders of rogue nations like Iranian putzhead Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, North Korean madman Kim Jong Il, Syrian leader Assad and Venezuelan strongman Hugo Chavez. Hillary is clearly coming across as more manly than the rest of the bunch, she's coming across as so militaristic of late that Rudy or Whomever better think twice before going down the all leftwingers are pussies on foreign policy road. Barack though seems to be developing a John Mayer kind of foreign policy waiting on the world to change. Even though I was against the war from the start this song has always annoyed me, it's all too typical of the naive and sappy left-wing idealism of celebrities these days and I also hate him because he has lived first-hand your body is a wonderland with Jessica Simpson. As a kind of afterthought if Reagan had a MySpace page and answered a question about global warming from a talking snowman it would have lacked a certain gravitas but there we are, you might as well throw in a question on Lindsay Lohan too. The Repubs, by not participating in any of these "fun" debates (or were they even asked?) come across as the Boredom Brigade, they probably even stopped having sex years ago. I mean who can beat Obama Girl?

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

The Hummer Liability Act of 2007

(no, get your minds out of the gutter)

I want a new law passed. Whenever you are forced to park next to a Ford Leviathan or Dodge Behemoth the SUV should have a passenger in it at all times so when you are done with your shopping or whatever and have to back out he or she will stand out in the road and help you back out, wave you on when it's okay. Failure to do so or not having a passenger in the SUV at all times while the driver is out doing his thing is an automatic summons of $150 AND if there's no one to help you out and an oncoming car creams you the owner of the SUV is liable for all your damages and then some. If nature calls carry an empty Snapple bottle.

Life on Interstate 684

So it was early in the Christmas season and I decided to go to the Danbury Fair Mall and on the way back I stopped at the Bedford rest stop and was sitting on top a picnic table enjoying a nice soda pop on a fine sunny day when this young and tall, rather stern-looking state trooper with a muscular build and the close-cropped hair approached me:

"What are you doing? Where are you from?"

"I just came back from the Danbury Mall to do some Christmas shopping and I'm on my way home, I live in Yonkers, why? is there a problem?"

"We've been getting alot of complaints about this particular rest area, people drinking beer, smoking pot and having intercourse in the woods."

"Which path do I take?"

Friday, July 20, 2007

Queer eye for the Democratic guy

The Great Gay Debate is coming up for the democratic presidential contenders, this right after the Howard University forum focusing on themes of interest to brothers. It's all about identity politics but imagine, just imagine, no, conjure it in your head, there you go! what if the Republicans had a Right to Life or NRA-sponsored debate, the fit would hit the shan (btw Lee, would you allow this? pooper-scooper wants to know if it's a filter bypass). I think they could have saved time by actually combining the black and gay debates.

Next up, the NOW Debate ("who's a better advocate for women's rights - John Edwards or Hillary? Well let's find out, let's oil up the abortion machines and see who can kill more kids")

The Greenpeace Debates

The Cindy Sheehan Forum

Here's a radical idea, how 'bout just having a debate?

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

Hedge funds headed for disaster

with Bear Stearns stock dropping like a rock to wipe out $512 million after two of their hedge funds are now almost worthless to investors,

with Wall Street now saying NO to giving cash to hedge fund companies that trade mortgage-backed securities,

with home foreclosures skyrocketing resulting in massive junk mortgage bonds which could result in wealthy hedge fund managers being in a blue funk mood anytime soon

the handwriting is on the wall. For the vast majority of us making ends meet means busting your hump. For some it means working in a hot kitchen six days a week with crotch rot. There ain't no get-rich-quick scheme, you're a gerbil on a wheel, and it ain't over 'til the Fat Lady sings or the politicians in Washington say when you can retire, we can always raise the retirement age you know until you croak and the bennies don't have to kick in. For most it means putting up with a prick of a boss 'cos you have 20 years to go on your mortgage and you just go to work everyday and get up on your boss's desk and assume the position, reamed 'n' cleaned without the Vaseline, until you retire with a bad foot from phlebitis and, if you're a man, a wet noodle and your kids put you in a nursing home and play games when they visit you like throwing peanuts in your gaping mouth with your head back because you don't know what's going on and they hate you and as soon as it's official they meet up with the lawyers to divvy up your estate, that overpriced hovel you and your wife bought 30 years ago,

but at least you don't have the hedge funds to deal with. Keep your life clean.

Society 200+ - Pervs 24

(Remember, you're innocent until proven guilty in a court of law)

In the three years since it's been on Chris Hansen's "Dateline - To Catch a Predator" series has nabbed well over 200 men trolling Internet chat rooms to have sex with underage girls. Not one has been let off, they have either pled guilty or been convicted or the cases are still pending, until now. In Murphy TX 25 men were caught in a sting including a prosecutor from a neighboring county. When cops approached Louis Conradt Jr.'s door to arrest him, this assistant prosecutor from Kauffman County killed himself. Now Collin County DA John Roach has decided to drop all charges against the remaining 24. Roach says one of the factors in his decision was that people other than cops were involved in the operation. Many of the fine citizens in Murphy also have a problem with Hansen's show to which Hansen has said that town is the only place where the show has encountered resistance.

So score one for the pervs. Ah, sweet liberalism, giving the pervs a fighting chance!

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Pro-lifers are single-issue people? Would that were the case

The more pro-life conservatives expound on other issues the more I wish they would just stick to pro-life. Dr. Laura, a stalwart pro-life conservative woman on the radio giving traditional moral advice to the confused until one day she wrote that women should look at a man's bank account prior to making a decision to go out with him, in short the moral case for golddigging, and now where is she? I mean why sour your base with a materialistic crapshoot of a point, and then there's National Review's Rich Lowry, more useful than she but who never met a Big Business practice he didn't like and then there's that hot Asian babe, the Malkin chick, who pretty much thinks the whole anti-war movement is about giving Michael Moore a rimjob. Laura Ingraham, same deal. Now Malkin, Lowry and Ingraham are the best in the pro-life biz as far as I'm concerned, their argumentation is fresh and vital to a debate that George Will considers stale but it's the other stuff, like Laura once pooh-poohing studies that show Americans are in a blue funk mood because they're overworked and don't have enough leisure time.

Friday, July 06, 2007

Should conservatives help Obama's campaign?

He says he's a fresh face who wants to end the partisanship in Washington and solve problems, sounds good but behind his moderate mask is a doctrinaire liberal who reflexively criticizes recent conservative Supreme Court rulings having to do with affirmative action and late-term abortion. The question before the Board today - should conservatives help his campaign anyway in order to defeat Hillary? This is purely a pragmatic calculation and it's been done before, support a liberal against another liberal because you like that liberal even less, and even if Obama is the Democratic nominee any Republican contender worth his weight should make short shrift of his inexperience in the Congress and his naivete regarding foreign policy. And he's not all bad, he talks about blacks taking on personal responsibility which sounds like he has Coz as a campaign advisor, that's more than can be said for Hillary who just this past March took money from a rapper who used the n-word at least 20 times in a song. A Hillary presidency would definitely revive Rush's radio career which, let's face it, has been in the doldrums of late. Though he denies it to this day Bill launched his career and Hillary can ripen it but what's in it for the rest of us?

The New York Times has noted a small but fledgling movement of young Republican conservatives who have decided to help Obama and says it may be a harbinger of things to come. I think these people are attracted to his character not his policies, they would agree that Bill's recent condemnation of Bush's "pardoning" Scooter Libby only shows how arrogant this Washington power couple still is despite them living with the owls in Chappaqua. Barack is like opening the window to some moldy and cobwebbed attic and letting the sunshine and fresh air in, that musty old yearbook of the Clinton scandals lying in the corner, just put it on the sidewalk with the rest of the recyclables.

So please help the brother. Make checks payable to Barack Obama.....

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

The weight of the evidence

We've all been brought up to believe that stereotypes are

a bad thing

and so we go through life and come across situations that seem to bear out their truth at least to a degree but we know this is

a bad thought

and so we put it out of our heads until you're a chef let's say and your new black co-worker comes in everyday and the first thing on her mind is "did you make the fried chicken yet?" and you say "I saved a piece for you" and then you're frying some chicken tenders just to give them some color before you shoot them in the oven but she's bothering you again and you say "they're still raw, just wait 10 or 15 minutes."

I've heard many chefs say that Jewish customers in restaurants kvetch all the time. Jackie Mason even jokes about this, they complain about EVERYTHING even the salt and pepper shakers. Now this ain't a prejudiced thing 'cause I hear even politically liberal chefs say the same thing or

Spanish guys and their libidos which never seems to take a holiday.

Gays never talk effeminate of course or have limp wrists,

feminists are all fun and games of course and just love men in between all the heavy politicking. Just don't follow them around or have your florist send them a bouquet.

It's just the weight of the evidence, know what I'm saying?

I know I'm supposed to blog about Scooter Libby

this is what some talking head said last night on "The Jim Lehrer Newshour", that the blogosphere would be going wild, rightie bloggers and liberal bloggers shootout at the OK Corral, but I'm an independent blogger, ok? Bush did the right thing by commuting Libby's 2 1/2 year prison sentence and so let's put it to bed. If this is the sexiest thing the blogosphere can come up with these days then I'll go elsewhere for my kicks. I really think Bob Novak rocks though.

Here's the deal. If electing a woman president is so important why don't the other male Democratic candidates get out of the race altogether, and that includes you Barack, and throw their weight and resources behind Hillary? No primary, ok, just achieve the last crowning achievement of the women's rights movement and put her in the Oval Office already or maybe this is just paying lip service to feminism. It's like step aside guys and put into practice what you've been saying all these years. Why does Hillary even have any male competition? This is so sexist. It's like Barack saying he's all for a "woman's right to choose" even to the point of partial-birth and then he picks up the abortion instruments and says "I can't do this, you're killing me."

How 'bout the Republicans putting up Condi Rice and making the race a real catfight? Rudy's face looks like that skull and crossbones emblem you used to see on the bottle of rat poison under your Mom's sink that used to scare you as a kid. We can do better than this and we must. Jungle fever, make it a chick thing is all I'm saying.

Friday, June 29, 2007

Maybe you haven't come such a long way baby

Last night on PBS there was the "All-American Presidential Forum Debate" held at Howard University in Washington, DC. The gig was hosted by Tavis Smiley and there they were, all eight Democratic presidential candidates, Hillary, Barack, Edwards, as they all proudly walked out on stage at this all-black, or mostly black, university. The thought occurred,

what if Howard were an all-white or mostly white institution of higher learning?

Howard still seems to hearken back to the separate but equal days of Brown vs. Board of Education in 1954 so where is the court order to make Howard more diverse?

Be that as it may Hillary was dressed smart as she's still fresh off her Sopranos spoof which, truth be told, Hillary and Bill are now funnier than SNL these days and, should her White House bid not work out, she should take over the show. Anyways, last night she said:

"Let me just put this in perspective: "If HIV-AIDS were the leading cause of death of white women between the ages of 25 and 34 there would be an outraged outcry in this country." Outraged outcry? You'll remember that blog I did about that manly meatwrapper of a woman I overheard while food shopping one day, she was pissed at something and said, "f****n' m*****f****r", or "f'n mofo", know what I'm saying, the adjectival emphasis on the mofo was not needed, I mean mofo is strong enough to stand on its own, no? and then Barack said,

"We have made enormous progress, but the progress we have made is not good enough."


Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Some celebrities who never got the Paris Hilton treatment

Dr. Death and Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, both interviewed recently by Mike Wallace on "60 Minutes"

Burt and Linda Pugach, subject of new movie "Crazy Love" and most recently very respectfully interviewed by veteran newsman Marvin Scott on Ch. 11 News here in NYC

Amy Fisher and her new old squeeze Joey (a few weeks ago on Ch. 2's "E.T. - The Insider")

Michael Schiavo of course, had "The View" girls lusting on the one-year anniversary, that romantic lug

The Menendez Brothers by none other than Babs herself. On why she interviewed them and yet refuses to chat with Paris she explained to Cindy Adams that they once did something important (I'm paraphrasing here), also something about Babs respecting herself

Son of Sam (lost count on those exclusives ratting out his fellow devil-worshippers)

Charlie Manson (Geraldo: "You're a dog Charlie")

Pornographers Larry Flynt and Al Goldstein. When the late NY Terence Cardinal Cooke was on his slow and agonizing deathbed Al famously took out bets on when he'd croak.

I'm sure more will come to me but, point being, they're not celebutards I guess. All of a sudden journalistic standards are making a comeback, who knew?

ah, the stench of skank, leave it to Larry to do the dirty work

Saturday, June 23, 2007

Affirmative action

As a conservative I'm naturally against it but a better deal for everyone would be if, instead of a government program based on race we had an informal system based on economic need this way poor whites on welfare would benefit as well as blacks and Hispanics. At any rate one of the unintended consequences of affirmative action as it is today is that, on occasion, you do get someone who totally does not belong in that job, everyone knows it and at first you're mystified that nobody seems to talk about it and that nothing is done, it's a classic elephant in the living room moment. This is not the goal of the proponents of race-based hiring but I've seen it on at least a few occasions and that's when your Peter Principle kicks in.

Isaiah Washington, the black actor on "Grey's Anatomy" who made the gay slur against co-actor T.R. Knight, has been fired from the show and the man is angry, said he did everything they told him to re atoning and that they now want to have Knight's character as a centerpiece of the show so this is interesting, apparently gay men trump African-American men in the victim stakes only it took a while longer to fire Washington than CBS Radio did in canning the I-man, well he was just a rickety old white cowboy anyway. If T.R. had responded in kind and called Washington the n-word it would have had a kind of karmic cancelling effect or something and would have confounded and stunned the whole pc crowd, what to do? two members of historic and time-honored victim groups have engaged in name-calling! do we fire them both and so not have a tv series at all or send them both off for reprogramming? Barring that maybe all T.R. has to do is question global warming and become pro-life and he can join the growing ranks of the damned.

Friday, June 22, 2007

If Hillary wins it all you can thank Ken Starr

Had he done a better job with Whitewater and how Hillary made 200G on cattle futures instead of issuing a report on Blowjob-gate I don't even think she'd be pursuing the Grand Prize right now and yet conservatives still refuse to admit this, that it was wrong to impeach Bill Clinton for lying in a sexual harassment case when they haven't been big fans of sexual harassment law all along ever since the days of Anita Hill (neither have I but z is a very consistent writer). Travelgate, Filegate, Chinagate, any other 'gate would have done fine except for Sexgate. Makes you wonder a little about Ken Starr, was he really on their team all along? Memo to conservatives, if you haven't noticed the mores of this country have changed drastically over even the last decade. Going after a sitting president solely on a sex charge (sorry Sean, I know, lying about sex) elicits more sympathy from the voting public these days than it would have in the past. There is a reason why the GOP keeps staying the Stupid Party.

The Sean Bell shooting case should come to trial soon. He was the 23-year old black man who was shot to death on Nov. 25, 2006 by cops in Queens NY after a bachelor party at the seedy Kalua strip bar, a gun, drug and prostitute-infested joint. He was to be married that same day. Two of his friends who were also in the car with him that morning were shot but survived and two of the four officers who fired some of the 50 bullets were indicted by a grand jury. I submit this - you're minding your own business and walking down the street, you're not breaking any laws, your chances of being shot and killed by a cop are infinitesmal at best, there's a better chance of Yoko Ono putting out a good album. There's also the ambience of crime in poor black urban areas to consider and cops are on edge, an angle the black activists never focus on. NYPD guidelines say a police officer cannot fire his weapon at a moving vehicle even if it is being used as a deadly weapon. The same guidelines don't say what a cop can do to save his life in such a situation. Careerwise I would not like to be a cop, a pimp gets more respect.

I'm the Sea Captain of my porno ship

Christopher Hitchens is all the rage right now with his atheist chic called God is Not Great but he doesn't offer a workable alternative to the world's faith systems maybe because there is none. The religion of Man teaches that Work is the main purpose of Life, the true Christian would say you were not born to be a drone. This is why it disturbs me that conservatives are ballyhooing the election of French President Nicholas Sarkozy with his promise to abolish the 35-hour workweek, the cons, if they haven't forgotten their social conservative roots, would say a work state is a godless state. Man, as well, has not be able to cure the Big One yet, cancer, and so Hitchens' philosophy of secular humanism doesn't work for me, why would I put on a pedestal a creature that overworks his fellow creatures and has stopped curing the ailments that afflict them? He's entitled to his opinions, it's just a poor substitute is all.

The work state leads to that tempting voice of nihilism, that shadowy figure on a sunny day that whispers in your ear until you agree that life's a bitch and then you die. So how do atheists like Hitch give meaning to it all? The grand theme of my blog - life is to be enjoyed and not just endured - is, in this sinner's humble view, more to be fulfilled in a balanced Christian life than in any secular system. I would submit that a person who enjoys sex more than he works understands the Meaning of it All better than some executive who works late and then has perfunctory sex when he goes home. These corporations have meetings - "ok, put him in charge of cheese" - and then you're like a mouse in a maze, "go find the cheese." Tantra or Kama-Sutra doesn't interest them, how can it if you don't have time to read or watch your kid's Little League game?

I was driving through the country the other day and noticed a little cultural trendoid, porn shops sprouting up next to places of worship, schools and parks where mothers take their kids. Used to be you had to put on a raincoat and head towards the wharf past the opium dens for your jollies but there he was, the big young blond manager of his very own porn emporium, the Proud Captain, a product of a system endorsed by Hitch that shows no deference whatsoever to Christian sensibilities.

The Sea Captain, standing tall, standing proud.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

I had this thought today

We've made some great strides in the understanding of our public health. We now know that sleep deprivation is bad for you (just ask Meredith Vieira) and that stress is a killer but these medical studies, while informative, are practically irrelevant:

Boss: "Thanks z for taking the time to see me. I've been reading these new studies and you don't have to come in at 6 in the morning anymore. 7 is too early either. I've noticed you look tired all the time, how can I help? Does 8 work for you? I'm concerned for your health and also anything you can't do today do tomorrow. As they say tomorrow's another day, I don't need you spazzin' out 'cos you're trying to get your work done on time. Your heart is my number one priority. I also think you're due for another vacation."

I was talking to a friend the other day and, without any prompting from me, he says Republican bosses like to work you to death. If someday science proves the existence of the spirit realm there's still some things you can do you lazy ghost you, don't you have anything better to do than haunt places?

"Hi, this is Sylvia Browne, your boss wants to know if you can come in today, somebody called in sick and they're backed up."

The Verizon Fios Kid, we're about due for another one of those horror movies with a weird kid in it, he'd also make a good Antichrist. It's true quam.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Bloomy the RINO

So now the erstwhile Republican Mayor of Gotham, Michael Bloomberg, has become an Independent so he can make the run in an already crowded field. It's not just that he echoes the Cinderella morality of today's blog title that I'd never vote for the guy, he's also living proof of the eternal truth of the Peter Principle. Take his latest, his traffic congestion pricing plan. From 6AM-6PM anyone who drives a motor vehicle into Manhattan below 86th Street gets slapped with a fine, $8 for cars and $21 for trucks, and this applies every day! Now trucks need to make deliveries to businesses during these hours and his plan, if implemented, would adversely affect business. NJ Governor Jon Corzine is being polite about it all and pointing out the pitfalls from his point of view but nobody seems willing to call the guy NUTSO and so I'm watching all the pundits on the morning shows today and they're all jazzed up about this guy who doesn't even know how to manage a large metropolis.

Hill and Bill's Sopranos video, I'd be really grasping to have a problem with this. We definitely need more humor in our political process and in life in general. I give it a thumbs up, two snaps and a circle.

The mouth is the best form of birth control

(get your mind out of the gutter) Within the past few years I've worked with 2 or 3 women, they're not unattractive by any stretch, and I thought to myself why can't I fantasize about them? It all reminds me of that old Henny Youngman quip, "I know you have to be somebody but why do you have to be you?" There are too many nice looking women with bad personalities out there, you're like how the hell did you come to be you? I am now convinced it all has to be part of the Master Plan, the Divine Cosmology, to give less comely women a fighting chance.

Bad sex leads to bad choices, this is my working theory to account for our high abortion rates. It's like when you have too much Scotch on a hot summer evening and then have weird dreams all night and then wake up in the morning all out of sorts or, if you're a man, you break down and rent a porno made by some retard, which pretty much describes over 90% of porn anyway, and so now you're angry at the producer, more angry at the video store manager who buys anything, and most of all you're angry at yourself,

where is the judgement?

For me good sex should not lead to the destruction of a fetus. I cannot separate the two, they are inextricably linked, the idea of potential feticide would just kill the mood for me and I've heard many other men from all shades of the political spectrum on the issue say the same thing. It's just not


now write an article about THAT Cosmo!

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Even though there are anywhere from between 1-1.3 million abortions in this country per year...

the now entrenched pro-choice position, shared by the msm, is that nobody is really pro-abortion. It would be the same logic to say that nobody is really for pedophilia even though the pervs are crawling out of the woodwork and right into Chris Hansen's kitchen. I realize there are a myriad of positions on the issue (just ask Rudy who spins the great big Wheel of Abortion Options every week) but I absolutely hate dishonesty and lack of candor. This medical "procedure" has become so commonplace that you begin to suspect deviancy at work as in maybe a small subgroup of these chicks just want a little Hoover action from time to time.

Some basics of moral philosophy -

The commonness of an act does not make that act any more moral than it was before it became so common.

You should have to prove the unborn are not human before you can legally snuff out their lives (can't be done).

It is logically impossible for abortion policy, ANY abortion policy, to be about a neutral set of non-views on the subject even though this is now the official Cuomoesque/Rudy position. The view that the unborn child has the same status as Hamburger Helper, now the prevalent element in the law, is itself a view. Who's fooling who here?

Any other point besides conception is purely arbitrary and whimsical. The fetus is really only fully human at 24 weeks, what was it 2 nights before? The fetus is only human at 20 weeks, what was it 2 nights before that? and so on backwards through time. This is masturbation of the mind big time and what this blog is all about. You say most people are only for the early first-trimester abortions? Then why do these customers patronize clinics that proudly boast in the Yellow Pages that they do fetal dismemberments up to 6 whole months? You people are complicit in a very great evil.

Pro-life is about logic and reason, in a word simple Right and Wrong.
Pro-choice is an emotional mess, an Orpah-fied version of reality, and they deeply resent us scolds for always reminding them of the Bigger Picture.

Monday, June 18, 2007

My life is so boring I think I'm Jack Bauer's girlfriend


What urgent and critical phone call is being expected?

You ever meet somebody and their eyes are darting up and down real fast while they're talking to you? They're forming an opinion. Easy guy, calm down, take it easy!

I was at a hot dog wagon once and this guy buys a few franks and hands the vendor a 100 dollar bill. What's going on clown?

The McGreeveys - she says his charge that she is homophobic hurt sales of her book Silent Partner but while they were married the former NJ Guv was having slurpees along the Interstate so like it's not like he cheated on her with any one Guy, he was having sex with Anonymous. She has every right to be homophobic and besides he could have given her AIDS. If he be the poster boy for Butt Sex I'd want custody of the daughter too.

I'm stranded I tell you, I'm stranded in civilization.

The Dark Cave of the Past - 1961 was a very bad year

From the New York Post TV Week for 6/12-23, Prime Time Adam Buckman, "TV jukebox pumps up summer shows":

"...'Mad Men' is the best new show of the summer. This series depicts the world of Madison Avenue advertising in 1961...For 'Mad Men', which premieres July 19, they have recreated the chauvinistic (emphasis mine) world of mid-town Manhattan at the dawn of the 1960s. People smoke all over the place - at their desks, in restaurants, even in elevators. Electric typewriters and push-button phones are considered the latest in 'new technology.' Everybody drinks, even during the day, and the men shamelessly harass their female co-workers, none of whom are co-equals."

So there you have it, the pc view of the Past as unmitigated Evil (the only thing missing from Buckman's commentary is back-alley abortions). This is the way men behaved when left to their own devices in those days without our current progressive legislation, new laws always being a necessity of course. Men of the Past being gentlemen was all a big hoax after all like Loch Ness. Puritanism is definitely the way to go, I mean smoking and drinking and flirtation in the office?? Call Mayor Bloomberg!! You can't come up with anything good about the Past you pc'ers? like, oh I don't know, intact families and low crime rates?

and why is the New York Post, widely considered the only truly conservative paper around these days, throwing around liberal buzzwords like homophobic (if homophobic means analphobic I plead guilty, got a problem with that)? And what's up with the word "preggers" now peppering Page Six, I mean that is sooooo gay. Just the other day some gay guy was reading about the latest celeb being preggers and said "that's way too gay for me."

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Another blast from the past

The Good Humor Man, selling junk food to kids.

The guiding philosophy of liberalism - we can always be better than our past.

He should be selling brussel sprouts and carrots to the little ones (and a Trojan or two couldn't hurt) but even then NBC Dateline's Chris Hansen would be leaning on a telephone pole on the corner keeping a cool eye on him.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

High-bias, Low-bias, Rather-biased

We need a good feud every now and then especially now since the big Rosie O'Donald war has petered out so there we have former CBS anchorman Dan Rather sniping at Katie Couric for her low ratings. In a cable interview he said they brought the Today show ethos to CBS in order to "tart things up" as he calls it. In response Leslie Moonves, CBS president, called him rather sexist. I don't know, I rather liked the now defunct FreeSpeech segment they had early on and other things in order to attract younger viewers. Open the window once in a while and let some fresh air in but z likes a good public feud nonetheless, in z's book

it's all good.

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Today's blog

Sometimes I wish I were a recluse with money.

People who don't go to the doctors all the time only when they really really really have to have quietly accepted their mortality and come to terms. It is the secular humanists who have to protect their health at all costs, after all after this life what is there? There was once a book called The Denial of Death by Ernest Becker which had as its working thesis that practically everything we do in our culture is a denial of this very brute fact of our existence. People who die young because of bad habits like smoking and heavy drinking, is this tragic or merely unfortunate? Depends on how you view eternity I guess.

Mental disorders, are they always bad? Yes, judging by all those corny health textbooks we had to read in high school but I submit a person with OCD is a better and more efficient worker and if he runs any kind of food establishment and the health inspector is due the next day the chances are very high his business will pass. I know a chef who admits he's been hyper with ADHD ever since he was a kid and he says it helps him in the kitchen. Mental aberrations, make them work for you (caveat - though not in the Pugach sense!).

The National Review, every time some left-leaning literary figure dies they always seem to underrate his work (or is this just my overly active imagination?). Happened with the late playwright Arthur Miller of Death of a Salesman fame, he was no better than a high-school playwright at best according to an NR contributor, and now with the passing of novelist Kurt Vonnegut. I guess according to NR you can't be a great writer if you lean too far to the left so what are we to have, only right-wing lit? Don't bash greed, better to write about nothing, certainly not your own passionate convictions.

Young male Spanish deli managers - they're on top of you, they're behind you, they're humping you, you're taking a dump and they're paging you. Is this how they are in bed?

RE Today's Blog, to quote Dennis Miller, "of course that's just my opinion, I could be wrong" (it's a blog after all).

Friday, June 08, 2007

Paris Hilton

Someone asked me the other day what is the purpose of Paris Hilton? I mean Lindsay at least acts and Britney sings but Paris doesn't have to work for the rest of her life but sees a shrink anyway. I know what her problem is, BOREDOM.

The Need to Have a Problem - I don't have any real major problems in my life so I'm going to go with Restless Legs Syndrome,

but anyway they (ah, the collective wisdom of THEY, they could write a book, why don't they? just all get together and call it "The Wit and Wisdom of They"), they say to do what you enjoy but even here it's still work. Let's say your passion is to cook but you find yourself putting in 16 hour days in the restaurant kitchen as is typical of most chefs these days, I think it's easier to just admit work sucks and put it on the backburner. I recently got together with two buddies of mine and we had a great trip but both guys kept looking at their watch and so we had an enjoyable half-day instead of a full day together because they both had to go to work later. Guys, don't you ever rest? I couldn't see marrying either of them but that would be gay marriage but you get the point.

Back to the Paris Conundrum - since you have so much time on your hands and the money to boot (nothing necessarily wrong with this, z's dream) latch onto a cause, Darfur, blood diamonds, radico-environmentalism, whatever, give purpose to your life. I mean if I had the luxury of not working for the rest of my life I'd at least be out causing.

Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Is Barack Obama not black enuf?

I mean, Hillary is blacker with her Southern drawl. He's not gangsta enough and he even went so far as to say if he loses the race it won't be because of his ethnicity, must've blew Sharpton's mind on this one. Did some pot in his youth but didn't rob any gas stations, doesn't refer to women as hos, doesn't hate whitey like the late racial activist Sonny Carson, doesn't walk around with his drawers falling down and his boxers showing,

I don't know dawg, this mofo is just too white for me.

I'm just not that into this whole House thing

what can I say, I'm just not, maybe I'm just not with it, like when you're sick and all there is on the tv are judge shows like Judy who, if she didn't have her schtick wouldn't be spending half a mil on interior decorating for her house. The crabby doc with the cane routine, he's a genius with a bumblebee up his ass, I mean is tv this stale or what, just hospital dramas and crime shows all the time? "We're losing him! we're losing him!" - holy crap, is this the best we can do? Stalkers, psychos, serial killers, real-life tales of guys eating Cap'n Crunch out of skulls. It's like the best thing I'm looking forward to this summer is Gordon Ramsay in Hell's Kitchen, he's like Simon Cowell in the kitchen, it's all so cruel but engaging. Rosie on "The View", say what you will but she made it happen, I mean before her there was Joy Behar and Barbara Walters, were they all that interesting to begin with? She Springerized the thing, God bless her! I got my DVD collection to keep me entertained on the slow nights although every once in a while you have to go through it and weed out some stuff, I mean how the hell did "Vanilla Sky" and Celine Dion's "A New Day Has Come" get in there? What was I thinking?

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Memorial Day

OK, pet peeve time.

Put the memorial back into Memorial Day. Stores like Macy's started this a long time ago with their Memorial Day sales events and then we started celebrating the day not where it fell on the calendar but stuck it on a Monday so as our spoiled culture could enjoy long weekends and then crowd the beaches like a bunch of sardines and not even swim in the water because it's still too cold. In a word, fun.

They did this with Washington and Lincoln, attached it to Saturday and Sunday and then just whitewashed the whole thing by calling it President's Day. Um, excuse me but we shouldn't honor all presidents like this, most of all Jimmy Carter and Bill Clinton. It's like they wanna break everything down from its original meaning. Kind of like a, ahem.....


(calling Robodoon)