Thursday, August 23, 2007

I'm going to chuck it all and become homeless

To hear conservatives tell it the homeless have the life. There's a homeless man in the big YO, a late 30-something blond guy with raggedy clothes who walks along that endless shopping plaza known as Central Ave. and who drinks coffee from cups that people throw away outside of Barnes and Noble. So one day we're driving along and my Republican friend, God bless him, says to me "look at that guy, he doesn't have a care in the world." Now I will admit sleeping under the stars on a 10 degree night does have a certain romantic appeal to it but I think this is why the Republican, whoever he is, will lose the next election to HillObama, that and lack of health insurance for millions of Americans. Now I understand the government paying your medical bills amounts to a form of European-style socialism but what is Republicans' alternative? It's like they don't even talk about it, it's not on their radar screen


so who better has their finger on the PULSE?

Saturday, August 18, 2007

50 cents away from a cure

You've basically been a good person your whole life but you were in the A&P once and there by the courtesy desk is the Muscular Dystrophy coinholder, you know the ones that hold several quarters in cutout circles so nobody's around and you lean over pretending to be looking at the sales flier and you pluck two George Washingtons for the coffee vending machine. Nobody gets hurt, it's a victimless crime and besides the government and private charities have been throwing millions at the dread disease for years, all those quarters are only for show to make the shallow feel good about themselves like they're really doing something. Decades later you pass on and are naked before the Lord as my mother would say. You are about to be accepted, the Gates are ready to swing open but the angel going over your life stops at something on the computer. He says to you mankind almost cured the dread MD but they were just 50 cents away from a cure.

are you in some deep doodoo!

Friday, August 17, 2007

Memo to John Stossel, they're still pervs

"20/20" is slated tonight to have a special expose of Chris Hansen and his NBC Dateline series "To Catch a Predator." Now early on in my blogging I did raise questions about the aggressive nature of this show, what if somebody is later found innocent? what about entrapment? but by and large those e-mails are pretty straightforward and, to paraphrase Sigmund Freud sometimes a perv is just a perv.

Libertarian Stossel needs to go easy, every once in a while, every blue moon or so people do care what other people do in their bedrooms.

Monday, August 13, 2007

My solution to the illegal immigration problem

If you're not willing to round up the, what's the latest figure?, 12 million or so illegals then regularize them, if you don't want to regularize them then deport 'em.

So you're a good ole American conservative and opposed the recent push to pass through immigration reform in the Congress, what exactly does this mean? Explain.

Don't deport then regularize, don't regularize then deport. Me? I think my position is pretty much on the record.

Monday, August 06, 2007

Phil Mushnick - grouch

Veteran sportswriter for the New York Post (why is this tabloid entering my blogging ways more and more these days?) Phil Mushnick is now a social critic-at-large too, he is now mostly a roving moralist. I remember him from years ago when New York City reporter for Channel 5 News (now Fox News) Penny Crone had a brief stint at WABC Radio and Mushnick called up to say she was unprofessional as a journalist to be rooting for the Yankees all the time (I know objectivity should apply to politics but sports?). Ever since then I knew he was a bit of a crank so it didn't surprise when he took the time to bash "Wheel of Fortune", arguably the most wholesome fare on TV, because, in his view they don't show enough close-ups of the puzzle to be solved. He's been ranting about Imus for years over his politically incorrect humor aimed at Jews, gays, blacks, old people, you name it. You see for Phil humor is never about nuance, it is what it is, forget the layering and don't bother him with your Cliff's Notes about your own jokes. Even though Mushnick is Jewish he is probably tempted at times to call the I-man the Antichrist. He's a decent enough fellow with good values but very strong on the censorship thing. It ain't his style to change the channel and neither should you. I can't judge the man except to say if you're having a party save yourself some grief and tear up his invite.

Saturday, August 04, 2007

You need a pill for the pill for the pill

TV commercial for Requip, used to treat the mysterious Restless Legs Syndrome, side effects may include nausea, drowsiness, dizziness, vomiting - you'll need another pill for all the side effects and if that pill causes additional side effects then you'll need a pill for that and if that pill.....I think I'll stick with the original ailment thank you.

Cialis, possible side effect: priapism - an erection lasting for more than 4 hours. Hey, read a good book buddy!

None of your %^#@* business

As reported in Page Six for Aug. 3: Time Out New York writer Alison Rosen asked former New York City Mayor Ed Koch "are you gay?" Koch: "When was the last time you performed oral sex on your boyfriend?" Rosen: "Well, I'm single now so it was a long time ago." (z - what's her # again?) Koch: "See, I don't think you should answer that question. (but she just did Ed) It's an improper question and so is yours. My sexual orientation is none of your business, and whether or not you performed oral sex on your boyfriend is none of my business." (I'll take that as a yes then)

Maybe it's all a moot point. Is there anyone out there, woman or man, gay or straight, who wants to have sex with the former mayor at this stage of the game?

Friday, August 03, 2007

Olde folk

(slated for late November, the Democratic AARP Bloggers Convention/Forum)

Now the folks I'm talking about here are not the Woodstock generation in their twilight years, you have to go back aways to know what I mean but I lived with an aunt once and I came home and bragged to her that I just spent only 3 bucks on a Mickie D's breakfast and she chided me for wasting money, said we have eggs here. These people, if funds are low they'll never go to an ATM, you see there are certain fees accruing ($2 maybe). So by eating sardines and crackers that night those 2 bucks they saved WILL make or break them. Then cars, the older some people get the less they like to drive, there's always the implication (or is it just my imagination?) that you really like to pack the miles on and maybe you do at times but that's only because you're claustrophobic and want to get out and see LIFE. Many folks, especially if they grew up in hard times, see everything in terms of a little Grapes of Wrath action. For me life's too short and you can't take it with you or, as someone once told me

I'd rather add life to my years than years to my life (actually he was a young cigar store clerk who probably couldn't wait to use this line to show how witty and Oscar Wildish he is and my friend and I were his next victims).

Conservatives who are really closet libs

Ann Coulter is a liberal plant to make conservatives look bad, that's old news but how 'bout radio commentator Michael Savage? Apatriot over at Hannityland has called him a "closet liberal" for years and at the time I dismissed this out of hand but last night he wouldn't talk about

The Bridge,

and so chose instead to bash the homeless (hmmm...). You see the homeless have deliberately and with aforethought chosen their lot in life of eating out of garbage cans because they are lazy and don't like to work. Now the phrase "doesn't like to work" has got to be the biggest cultural brainwashing done by the Right to date, hey, if you don't like WORK there must be something wrong with you, right? Not to toot my own horn (but go ahead) I've worked hard my whole life and have gotten rave reviews from employers but if you asked me a simple and direct question, "do you like work?", philosophically I'm very much against it, it's like what man wouldn't rather have a fishing rod or golf club in his hand? Homeless people, yep, they have the life.

But the real tipoff that Savage (nee Weiner) is a closet lib is when he said the radical Islamists are that way because they're sexually repressed (hell this country isn't and look at our problems) and he said the solution would be to airlift massive amounts of porn over the Middle East and drop it down (and oh yes, he supported uber-liberal California gubernatorial candidate Jerry Brown once). Now I don't know if there's such a species as a pro-porn conservative so I have to check my encyclopedia but last time I looked Dennis Prager fancied himself one too.

So enjoy the new series and send in your candidates.

Thursday, August 02, 2007

Our inept Department of Homeland Security

They've just ended the search for any real survivors in that tragic bridge collapse in Minneapolis when our own Dept. of Homeland Security sent word out that it doesn't appear to be an act of terror. Excuse me but isn't it way too early to be making these assessments either one way or the other? Why not just say it's being investigated and here's another thought, how do we know there aren't terrorists amongst us who are construction workers and bridge repairers and working with steampipes underground of major metropolises who are deliberately weakening our infrastructure or others who are tainting our food supply? Even if this were the case political correctness would be our own undoing and we'd never get to the bottom of anything, don't like working with that Muslim Con-Ed guy? you racist pig you.

The tragic I-85W bridge in Minnesota, not saying it is but what's up with our Dept. of Homeland Security making such impromptu announcements? Why does Bush even keep this Chertoff guy on, this guy who shortchanged New York City of much-needed anti-terror funds even though everyone knows Gotham is at the top of Al-qaeda targets? It's a little sketchy to me.